Strange Dreams

For the first few months of the pregnancy, I was completely knackered all the time. I'd come home from work, wolf down my dinner and be in bed by eight o'clock. Biajee found himself doing all the cooking, washing and tidying.

With me in bed by dusk, he'd end up spending countless nights alone surfing the web until he realised that this was actually a good opportunity to study some programming or read to me. There was a Bible we ordered for pregnant moms - What To Expect When You Are Expecting.

"You can do what you want," I said, regally. "I don't give a toss. I'm going to sleep." His oral English has improved quite a bit during those weeks.

Dreams became complex and surreal for both of us. He had a thrilling dream of me giving birth to a green alien and then he put it back into my tummy.

Meanwhile, I was having spooky premonitions of looking after a child, dreams which would often end with me waking in sheer terror. I also woke him up at midnight because I dreamed of stepping into lots of dirty toilets in Beijing, things that had haunted me since I was a kid. Pregnancy can bring your best and worst memories in life to the extreme.

Scary Times

We both found it difficult to get excited in the first few months of pregnancy. Like many, I was a slightly reluctant mom, but even the most enthusiastic mothers will feel that the whole thing is a bit unreal. And the complete lack of any bump for the first few months led even Biajee to doubt that I was pregnant at all.

There's also the very real fear of miscarriage, which is a large part of the reason why I didn't work out at all during the first few months. That fear only really subsided at the 20-week ultrasound scan, when Dr. A assured us that everything was fine and dandy. It still seemed a very surreal experience, with the images on the sonogram largely meaningless to the untrained eye.

Pregnancy, of course, got us panicking about money. How were we going to pay for this? How much maternity leave is paid? What paternity leave can he afford to take? Can we move to a bigger house? How much will it cost to have this little sod leeching off us for the next 20-odd years?

We started projecting ahead, thinking about going part-time, and then recoiling with horror when we found out the cost of local nurseries, doulas and baby stuff.

We actually found that life became much cleaner. As our attentions become more focused, we started getting ultra sensible about our house. We started tidying up rather a lot. That crappy family room we'd vowed to change ever since Biajee moved in finally got fitted. That closet in our bedroom got sorted out at last. The faintest whiff of fatherhood suddenly endowed Biajee with rudimentary DIY skills that had never belonged to him for his whole life. I suddenly found that he could tape, paint, saw, drill holes and put up curtains.

Exercise Thoughts

Morning sickness, or "24 hour sickness" in our case turned me into sophisticated bulimics. I would suddently disappear into the restroom halfway through a nice dim sum course or a creamy lasagna entree, after which Biajee would hear a barrage of coughing or retching sounds, which he'd try to politely ignore. Hours later I'd blithely demand him to cook for me again so that I could have something to throw up. Whatever goes down comes up those days.

The cardinal rule of any relationship, of course, is that no man should ever make a detrimental remark about his partner's weight. The law is that pregnancy insulates me from all criticism. If I want to have 8 meals a day of steak, Alaskan King Crab Legs, lamb chops, hotpot and Ma Po Tofu with rice, congee and steamed bread, that is my right. Comments like "Watch the amount you're swallowing, you fat cow." definitely won't work too well with me. "It's all your fault that I'm the size of a house. Look what you did to me - you f***ing b**t." would be thrown back at him. So shut up and cook.

As far as food cravings, I have exercise cravings. Of course I could not do a lot in the first five months since I have to puke every 2 hours. For the past two mornings though, we've been to the gym, doing weights every day, climbing stairs or playing basketball. Dr. A confirmed to us today during our 10 minute visit to his office that I could still exercise regularly like I used to do. The only challenge is to drag Biajee out of bed at 6 am every morning. He, for sure, is no morning person - it only took him an hour to leave bed every day. Our alarm is set at 5:50 am and he still gets to work at around 9. I hope we could continue to do this as long as I'm not sick. Even if I grow into the size of a godzilla, I'd want to be an active one.

Crepe (煎饼果子)

It is a basic rule that a couple need some common interests to get together and stay together. One of the most thrilling common interests between Biajee and me is FOOD. Needless to say, it has to be good and delicious food, not necessarily expensive, but has to soothe the taste buds.

I've dragged Biajee to all the best restaurants in Denver and Boulder area since I moved here. His boss is astounded that we have been to the Flagstaff House, Manor House and The Fort - the most expensive, luxurious and gourmet dining experiences you could ever find in the Great Midwest. Whenever there is a Grand Opening of a Chinese restaurant, we'll drive there in a heartbeat.

During those good days, we eat like pigs and drink like fish. However, there is always one empty spot in our heart - we miss the CREPE (煎饼果子). We didn't appreciate it that much while we were living in China and it started to bite us now that we cannot get anything close to it in the US. Biajee ensured me that we could cook it ourselves. We need the tools. It had been a 6 month process for us to look for the crepe pan. We ordered a huge raw iron pan online 2 months ago and only found out that this was a heap of iron fresh out of mold - the pan is too rough for any cooking, the size is almost comparable to the baby's bathtub and the weight is heavy enough to break my waist. It happens that way when you buy things online...

We regretted that we had not bought one when we had our honeymoon in Mexico City. Mexican people love burritos, tacos and crepes. So do French people. After mourning for 2 months, we finally came across this extra-large griddle in the Wal-mart SuperCenter in Westminster last Sunday. This is the only Wal-mart that has it because a large Hispanic population shop there. The griddle is a handsome and it is custom made for Wal-mart.

Last night we had the best supper in February. Biajee made a crepe spreader with the wooden ruler from Home Depot - it was for stirring up paint, but we figured it could be used more efficiently in kitchen. 85% green bean powder mixed up with 15% grinded millet and you spread it on the griddle, draw a round circle, add an egg, chopped scallions and cilantros, wait for 2 minutes between 250 to 300 degrees, flip it, touch up sweet sauce, fermented bean curd sauce and chilli sauce. Biajee got really good at it and could make the perfect round crepe in the end - we were talking about selling them all night long. The juicy bite and tender feeling of the crepe filled up our mouths - we had fresh hot soybean milk with them. Before we knew it, we finished about 8 of them and almost used up a whole box of eggs.

All the homesickness suddenly vanished - we are a super couple and can actually eat like we're in Heaven.

Biajee was still snoring like thunder when I opened my eyes this morning. I started to realize how lucky I am and I should at least keep him for another day...

Baby's Room

We had a fruitful weekend. Between going to work on Saturday morning, watching the Winter Olympics in Torino, seeing 3 movies in one day and sleeping until after 12 pm, we managed to squeeze in the project of tearing down all the taping in the newly painted room and moving all the baby furniture into it.

For the past 4 days, I've been cuddling in the couch and sleeping like a dinosaur whenever the clock hits 9 pm sharp. Biajee had to do all the dish cleaning, surfing the internet, laundry and arranging the baby room during the time I'm unconscious. Certainly he doesn't get any credit for any of the above things because I haven't seen him working on them. Some house elves must have come by and finished all the work for us.

We spent the whole afternoon vacuuming, putting back the draperies and installing the crib for the baby on Sunday. The crib looks more like a cage to me. It probably is cute in some ways, but I couldn't remember the day I had to sleep in that thing at all. It took us 2 trips to Home Depot to get the suitable Dowel Pins for it. I somehow succeeded in embedding the idea into Biajee's mind that the baby needs a computer desk the minute he moves in. It looks suitable in his room, but more than likely we'd use it as the changing table for the first 2 years.

This baby is a rotten kid already. I remember that I didn't have my own room till I was 14 years old when I grew up. And I never had a single stuffed animal until I went to college. Perhaps it's why the house is full of puffy bears, donkeys and bunnies now. We're both excited to have this baby move in: I can buy more toys - maybe a colorful moving caterpillar (the baby will like it and I've always wanted one too) and Biajee, on the other hand, will apparently invest more in toy guns and video games.

PowerBall

We invested $5 in the $300 million payout Power Ball. Of course we didn't win, otherwise I may have hired someone to Blog for me. My dreams of moving into a mansion in the mountains, hiring 4 nannies and 3 maids for our baby turned into broken bubbles again.

Someone living in Nebraska got all 6 numbers match and won $365 million. It is a 1 in 146,107,962 chance. Biajee saw it on TV while I was sleeping in sofa and he didn't even bother to tell me.

I don't think he cares about it or wants us to win. He loves our current life and wouldn't want to live anyway differently. To win a jackpot with all that money means you have to hire a financial planner and an attorney immediately. People might want to slip and fall on your doorway to get money. Friends and relatives will start asking for money as well. It won't ever be a struggling worker-bee life like what we're leading right now.

Valentine's Day

It was the last Valentine's Day we were only by ourselves. Next year there'll be another member to the family.

The amazing thing was that all the good restaurants in Denver and Boulder area were fully booked a week ago. We finally found this place called Hilltop Cafe and it's located in Golden. The earliest time they had open was 8:00 pm. Obviously this state is not as upper class as New York or Florida.

Food was gorgeous and the presentation of food was splendid. Our favorite appetizer was coconut battered scallop stuffed in crispy egg roll with mashed sweet potatoes. We had never had anything like that in our whole lives.

The waiters and waitresses are absent-minded people though. We never got served bread for the whole course of dinner. Not that we are bread fanatics, but it's a necessary part of a formal western style dining experience. Neither of us cared enough to ask for it though.

There was a vase with one or two fresh roses on each table and we observed that almost every couple took the vase and flower after they paid the bill. We were starting to wonder whether this was a tradition of this place to give out free vases and flowers to their customers. We didn't take the one on our table though because the waiter was cleaning while we got ready to leave.

By the time we got into the car, it started snowing. A romantic scene. Biajee was starting to wonder about what we're going to do on Valentine's night next year - we'll be stuck with Junior and order pizza takeouts...

The Art of Painting

One thing we all should have learned from marriage is that never take it literally if a man tells you that he is going to do something. Biajee had promised to do all the painting by himself because any reasonable person on this planet would have agreed that it’s not a brilliant idea to have a 5 month pregnant woman work on all these paints. Yet I did 9/10 of the painting while he did 9/10 of the complaining.

Required materials: Tape, Roller, Brush, Paint, Tray, Work Clothes (you don't mind staining them or throwing them away) and a protective cap (so you don't get a free styling for hair).

My innocent hubby had never painted in his whole life. I, on the opposite, had helped friends paint clubhouses and fences before. Neither of us had taped before so we were starting from ground zero.

It took us the whole week to move all the furniture and tape up the edges, windows and doorways. Before we started the project, Dr. A had advised me that I shouldn’t climb any ladders or use any lead-based paints. It’s a magnificent idea to leave the windows open all the time so that I don’t get drowsy because of the smell. Taping probably took four fifth time of the whole project and 125% of anyone’s patience. One night after I had slithered on the floor like a pudgy serpent with my belly down for over an hour, Biajee finally made up his mind to seal the taping step for good. I was waiting for him in bed all that time. I get used to him being the comfy cushion I lay my head on and it’s really hard to fall asleep without him snoring by me.

We chose a color called Bluster Day, which was a cheering light blue that could ignite anyone’s day. Biajee’s job was to finish anything that’s between 5 feet 9 inches to 6 feet of the wall. My job was to take care of any space within my reach without me having to stretch or get on to a ladder. We did 2 walls on Saturday. Biajee was already comparing himself to Michelangelo when we finally washed up all the tools after 2 hours. Michelangelo painted the ceiling for a church for 6 months and then couldn’t move his neck for a whole year. I told him that he wasn’t even painting the ceiling yet. Whiner.

Maybe men are all like that. You can’t rely on them for anything. He wouldn’t have moved a single finger if I hadn’t suggested that we paint in the past weekend. And if I hadn’t been pregnant, I’d be the one who initiated, started, worked and finished the whole job. And he murmured about what a hard job it was all way through. I hardly commented at all. I was just thinking that I would raise my son a different way – he’ll have to cut the grass next spring…

Interview with a Doula

Amy Starr Allen is the lady who will come to help me for 2 weeks after the baby is born. She is half way through getting her certificate in labor and postpartum Doula. I understand that millions of women have done this before, yet it's still a big deal when it comes to myself. We have to make sure everything is all right and taken care of.

Doulas are trained in Adult, Kid and Baby CPRs. They usually help with light cooking, baby laundry, running errands, answering the phone while I am sleeping and taking care of the baby a bit when I need to nap or shower. She could show me how to bathe the baby, how to breast feed, instruct me what not to eat while nursing and keep me in bed while running downstairs to get food for me.... All the nice stuff. She has a daughter who is only 10 months old. We really like her a lot.

We have read the contract after she left and will sign and make a deposit very soon. I'm thinking she might need to come over again before the baby is born so that I could show her around the house, the washer and dryer, where everything is stored in the kitchen, etc. It'll be chaos right after the child is born. We might put up a "SOLD" sign in front of the house so that friends don't come over too often to see the baby. Also, 2 friends have offered to throw a baby shower for me - we have to make up our minds pretty soon. It might be a good idea to email all my local friends to take turns and bring us food every day for a while....

There is so much to do and so little time...

Trip Log 4 (Feb 5th, 2006)

The only thing we saw before leaving for the airport was Museum of Flight. It was next to Boeing's previous headquarters. There are a lot of rides in the museum that are non-suitable for people with high blood pressure, heart attack or pregnancy. It hit me really hard that I belong to one of those categories. Thus, we only walked around and took pictures for 2 hours.

We had sandwiches at the airport. Everywhere in town was signs for Seahawks. It is the first year that they ever made it to Super Bowl. Frontier Airlines gave us such a break that they would let all passengers watch Super Bowl for free. Frontier is a Denver-based airline and they claim they offer great service and 25 TV channels on board. However, on our outbound sector, we found that only 2 channels were free: the flight route and the cartoons. You have to pay $5 for the additional channels. It goes up to $8 if you have a craving for HBO. It's nothing compared to JetBlue service, although JetBlue got its own safety and emergency landing issues.

Seattle did great in the first half of the game. The referee took away their first touchdown and granted one to Steelers. That makes a 11 point difference right there.

The half time show involved Rolling Stone. I suddenly had a fear that our baby would look as ugly as him and maybe covered by jellos when he enters this world. Biajee said that would be better looking than Steven Tyler. But Steven Tyler's daughter is at least beautiful. If we have to have a son who looks like an alien, we might as well wish that our grand kids are presentable.

We were so obsessed with it that we watched the 2nd half of the game at Denver airport. Biajee is a super fan for Steelers and I just cheered for Seattle Seahawks all way through to piss him off. His team beat mine in the end.

We got home at around 10:30 pm. Both of us were exhausted. We sank in bed and passed out immediately.

Trip Log 3 (Feb 4th, 2006)

We didn't take any pictures today.

It took Biajee a while to find the port for the famous Washington State Ferry. Water is about 600 feet deep around some of the areas near Seattle so no bridges can be built. There was another route down south to drive over to Olympics National Park, but Biajee made the decision to proceed from the north side. By the time we got our car on the ferry, it was almost noon. It cost $16.70 and 35 minutes for both of us and the car to cross the intercoastal waterway.

Port Gamble Bridge was closed because of the gusty wind the night before. We had to go down State Road 3 around the canal and then up north again for the park entrance. Only then did we find out that the ferries or bridges are well worth the money - it's 4 more hours drive without the ferry or bridge. I figured that there might be only 600,000 hours in my life. One third of it was used for sleeping, 1/3 used for work, 1/6 used for eating, 20,000 hours for working out and sex, 20,000 hours for house work, there are only 40,000 effective hours left for fun. This lousy road wasted 4 hours of our time, 0.01% of fun in life. I'd rather pay $100 to buy those 4 hours back....

We made it into Olympics National Park when dusk fell. It was dark, cold and snowing while we were driving around in the park. Olympics is famous for its rainforest. It is the least explored National Park. To get a true taste, you need to prepare for at least a week's hike and backcountry camping. Obviously we were more interested in Korean food than hiking in snow.

We took the same ferry back to Edmonton and rushed into a Korean restaurant. Food was non-comparable, but we were obliged to sit on ta-ta-mi and finish our meal within 30 minutes. People there need a life. They really don't care about stupid customers like us or making some more money. Biajee and I entered the restaurant at 9 and got kicked out by 9:30.

What an experience! Everything could have gone wrong went wrong. However, I had to compliment him whenever I was awake and tell him what a nice time I'd been having while I really longed to find a restroom and pee. Men are like cats - if you smooth them the wrong way, they'll bite you...

Trip Log 2 (Feb 3rd, 2006)

We got up at 5 am - neither of us remembered that we had an hour's time lag from Denver. We were the first dine-in customers at the local McDonald's. The manager opened the door for us. On the way to Mt. Rainier National Park, we even saw sunrise for a few minutes, which was super for Seattle. Most of the park was closed except that we could drive to Paradise Road. By the time we got to the furthest point, it started snowing heavily. The rainforest was magnificent even when it was pouring. The drive was quite challenging, but I was asleep for most of it. It was an absolute advantage to have a husband who could drive. I didn't know at that time that he would be kicked out by our insurance company since he had accumulated more than 8 points in the last 36 months. He enjoys driving with a suspended license and most of all, speeding.

We decided to have dinner on the top of Space Needle in downtown Seattle. It is 620 feet tall and is a great place for dating. I mean, if you want to impress a lady or propose to her, it's a romantic idea to fly her to Seattle and present her that piece of diamond on top of Space Needle.

Biajee obviously knew photography very well, especially how to take pictures of night views. All we need is a nice tripod, which we carried all the way from Colorado. The pictures turned out beyond my expectation. I suddenly became a pro for night shots and we walked around town to find good objects for me.

My heartest desire was to go on a plane trip somewhere, anywhere, when I could still fly, other than Colorado. Biajee had realized it for me. Once I stormed around the gift shops downtown, my wishful thinking targeted for taking a nice postcard shot of the Space Needle. Again this had been granted as well. I suspect that I'm too easily entertained.

Biajee's wit and charm shine in a way that he could make everything so simple and so messy for us at the same time. Out of the 519 pictures we downloaded last night, only 3 or 4 turned out presentable. It is still a mistery how he managed to produce the worst photos with the best camera - well, since when was he normal anyway??? I should definitely keep him to myself for the benefit of our society...

Trip Log 1 (Feb 2nd, 2006)

It's really necessary to back blog our Seattle Trip.

The most precious advice I got for pregnancy and preparing for the family is: Always remember to leave space for you and your spouse only. Do not let the baby take over everything. It could be hard sometimes, especially after the baby is born. However, it's really important to do so. We all need some sanity time. We both need to cater our love for each other and remember how we created this wonderful little person who will replace us in future.

Perfect timing to get onto the plane. I'm not too big and I'm not that nauseaous all the time. Doctor said I could fly up till 32nd week.

It was cloudy when we landed. The rental car was a blue Chevy Aveo without even a cassette or CD player. We regretted that we could not find the charging cable for our iPods.

Chinatown was a great place for lunch. Ferry boat is a must take. The Rain God declared his appearance as we were half way on the ship. It was a one hour tour around the harbor. Nothing in comparison to the cruise in Kenai Fjords National Park, but you do see groups of male sea lions from California. They are all bachelors without mates. I do miss the times when I'm still single and can travel around the world whenever I can. Yet, I do not want to undo this baby or this marriage.

The first Starbucks store was established in 1912 at the end of Pikes Market Place. That's the only place where the symbol is a mermaid with her breasts and two tails. When they rolled the chain all over the nation, her breasts were covered by her hair. Biajee and I took great shots of her. We like naked mermaids.

Rays Boathouse is an ideal place for a nice seafood dinner. The restaurant located right on water with great views - well, if you arrive there after dark, you couldn't see too much at all.

We were both soaked with rain by dinner time and we bought the most expensive umbrella in a downtown convenient store. Sex shops are all over the place. Likewise the casinos. Seattle bears the highest suicidal rate in the nation because people get depressed easily when it is rainy or gloomy 270 days per year.

I'm happy that we still hadn't killed each other by the time we went to bed...

Live bookmark of the blog

As an IT person, it is so ashamed not having known the atom/RSS news feeding function for a long time. Basically, if a website has this function, you can get a live bookmark for the website. Every time if there is an update in the website, you can know immediately whether the website is updated by just look at the live bookmark on your browser.

For Firefox user, you only need to click the icon on the right side of the address bar. Now, look at bookmarks again, you will see the titles for all recent blogs. :)

For IE user, you can download and setup Feed Scout plug-in software to do the similar thing.

For Safari user, you only need to click the blue "RSS" icon on the right side of address bar. The rest is pretty straight forward.

For Opera user (What? never heard of Opera?), again you only need to click the blue "RSS" icon on the right side of the address bar. And there will be an item added in Feeds menu...

Now, you can add our blog to your live bookmarks. Alright, guys and gals, enjoy the new technologies.